My guilty pleasure has always been the relationship advice section in magazines (followed closely by very tacky, eccentric Horoscopes). I love reading cringey stories, especially after experiencing my own personal disasters to make them seem that bit less horrific. I also enjoy adamantly disagreeing with all the outrageous advice and insisting that my own solutions would be much more successful. This quickly got pretty old when every piece of advice seemed to be ‘tell him the truth’, ‘ask her how she really feels’ or ‘just read all their text messages’ though. This is when I reluctantly gave up my teenage hobby of obsessive nosiness (for a little while).
However, I have just discovered Dan Savage; a fantastic, outspoken relationship columnist, and now I’m back in the game! You can find loads of his videos online, answering questions from ‘how do you talk to your child about sex?’ to ‘what can straight people learn from gay peoples relationships?’ His advice and comments are great. He doesn’t give tepid, neutral, ‘sensible’ opinions that advice columnists tend to. Instead, he answers with realistic, human logic that someone might actually follow. Basically, I can’t compliment him enough.
BUT! I recently came across one of his videos that I had to strongly disagree with. In a round-about way it says that humans aren’t wired for monogamy, it’s not natural and that many relationships would be stronger without it. You can watch it below:
Savage’s argument is that humans aren’t genetically wired to be monogamous and that most relationships would be stronger if sexual freedom were adopted. My argument is that, sure, we may not be genetically wired to be monogamous but we’re definitely not wired to share our loved ones with any ol’ guy either. Give us couples a bit of credit, we like each other too much to share our lover boys/lover girls. I’d much rather monogamous the hell out of my relationship!