As you may have guessed by the title of this blog, I try to write something a little bit strange every Wednesday. I came up with this idea on my last trip to the doctors. Normally, I wouldn’t be feeling so inspired by a tube going in my ear, but something obviously clicked! I hope you enjoy my very literal check up.
In Your Head
Nelly waited in another, white, clinical doctors office for the fifth time this month. She kept going, hoping that someone might be able to fix her, but no one had managed so far. A petite doctor with an oversized white coat and fluffy brown hair flew into the office like a small tornado. She didn’t even look at Nelly, she just bounced into an oversized chair and scrolled through her computer.
“So, you’ve got depression, anxiety, panic attacks and mood swings.” She said, somewhat over-enthusiastically.
“Well, that’s what they say.” Said Nelly, unenthused.
“Alright, let’s have a look at it then!” Said the doctor, bounding out of her chair.
“At what?” Said Nelly, nervously.
“But the other doctors just asked me questions, they didn’t look at… my brain.”
“Maybe that’s where they were going wrong!” Chuckled the doctor “Come on!”
The doctor swatted Nelly out of the chair and over to the examination bed, Nelly climbed up awkwardly. She lay down and watched the doctor hurrying around the room, picking up and putting down various metal objects. She wondered at what point she should assume the doctor was completely mad and leave. She decided that if the doctor picked up a scalpel, then it was time to go.
“On to your side then, dear.” Said the doctor, appearing next to Nelly.
Nelly turned on to her side obediently. She could see the doctor was holding a long thin tube with what looked like a small marble on the end.
“Let’s have a look at those thoughts!”
Nelly tried to turn her head to see if the doctor was serious, she certainly sounded serious. The doctor pressed Nelly’s face back down and inserted the small marble-like-thing into her ear. It felt cold and wet. Nelly could only just hear the doctor’s voice now.
“What did you say?” Shouted Nelly.
“That’s not me, dear.” Said the doctor “Don’t worry, it’ll get clearer, the closer we get.”
Nelly thought this was probably the time to leave, the doctor was clearly insane. Before she could move though, the cold marble dangled further into her head, touching a nerve she had never felt before. The voice continued to echo faintly, too muffled to make out. Nelly’s limbs twitched as nerves were knocked by the alien object. Suddenly, sound erupted into her head as if a microphone had been switched on inside her. Hundreds of voices chattered over an unbearable whooshing sound, all sorts of voices, from angry shouting to frustrated muttering, and tearful wailing to arrogant ranting.
“Don’t worry!” Said the doctors voice, ever so distantly, now “Once we get out of the main thought canal, things will get clearer!”
There was a crackling sound as if a radio was being tuned in Nelly’s brain, the voices separated and cleared. For the first time, Nelly could hear one of them clearly.
‘I don’t know if I want to do this… What am I going to do with a history qualification!? Mum and dad will be so unhappy if I quit now though…’
Nelly felt the tube rush to another area of her brain.
‘I hate her! I hate her! I hate her! What kind of a friend does that!?’
The tube moved again. Nelly felt her heart rushing as she heard the thoughts that she was too scared to say out-loud, or even think out-loud.
‘He doesn’t love me! I have to let go. I can’t make this mistake again…’
“Can you hear all of this?” Nelly said, shyly.
“It doesn’t matter, dear.” Replied the doctor “You need to hear it.”
“But, there’s no point in this!” Shouted Nelly, trying to block out more buried thoughts “It’s in my head, I know all this!”
“Just because it’s in there doesn’t mean you know it, dear.” Said the doctor, knowingly.
The doctor shoved the tube further into Nelly’s mind.
A new cluster of voices erupted into her consciousness, bare, honest and desperate to be heard. Nelly gulped. The crazy, little doctor was right. She squeezed her eyes shut and listened to what she really thought.